The Art of the Restart

One of my intentions this year is to speak up against unkindnesses.

Simple enough, right? But when someone I want to admire me says something prejudiced or demeaning, my courage can wilt in the face of my hunger to be liked. So this year, I’m building up that speak up muscle.

The first few days were uneventful. Then, one tired Sunday, someone I care for said something misguided. And I didn’t say anything. It was easier not to.

I had a hunch this might happen. I don’t doubt my ability to change. But I know the force of human habits, and their might can suck any well-intentioned soul back.

So the second part of my intention is to gently restart myself when I stop. Not to wait for the next morning or the next Monday, but to do it in the next moment. It has been said, and I do believe, we can restart our day at any point.

We are beautifully human, prone to our familiar tendencies. And we are beautifully human, able to stretch beyond the confines of our known skin. We contain both the resistance to change and the ability to change.

If we start to make change, then slip back into old ways, the change is not a failed one. It is only failed if we don’t restart it. And with each restart, we further empower our ability to transform and lessen the authority of our resistance to it.

My aim is to restart, immediately and with gusto. And to absorb the learnings along the way (be curious and not judgmental, have a few key phrases to fall back on, don’t counter unkindness with more unkindness).

We can change. We can bumble up our change. And we can begin again. Without question, a little stronger than before.

The Lightning Notes is funded by kind donors. If something here strikes you, I'd be grateful if you'd consider donating. Click to Donate!


Making ChangeCaitie Whelan