Let It Take As Long As It Needs to Take
Several years ago, I sat across from my friend Janet and said to her:
I don't understand why this healing is taking so long.
I was recovering from a wound that had plunged deep, bent my spirit, nearly broken my body. The mending process had begun. But it was slow, stumbling.
If I say I'll get something done, I get it done, I told Janet. But this... I'm not getting it done. I sighed, felt my body shrink down.
We are so used to a rapid pace of life, Janet looked right at me as she spoke. Her brown eyes had an unconquerable kindness.
She pointed at her phone. You can email someone in India, she would get it now. I can text you, your phone buzzes immediately. We can fly across the country in hours, around the world in less than a day.
Janet paused for a moment. But, she said, there's no reason why the pace of healing would be any faster now than it was hundreds upon thousands of years ago.
I listened quietly.
You are healing yourself, Caitie, Janet said. Show up for that healing, let it take as long as it needs to take. Don't make it take longer by demanding it go faster or berating yourself for going slowly.
I exhaled. It was like she had given me permission for this to take time.
And with that permission, she handed me this balm.
You aren't in isolation, Caitie, Janet said. Many are in the long, slow healing with you. She smiled gently. It comes with being human.