How We Handle the Stuff That Gets in the Way
So much so easily gets in the way of being the people we want to be.
For me, a short list includes buying into someone else's definitions of success and power. The cultural chatter from magazine covers and red carpets telegraphing what beauty is. And parts of me - the fearful parts, the parts that want to belong no matter what, the controlling parts.
So when I think about the stuff that gets in the way, it's the stuff that makes me less conscious and more accepting of the narratives society spoonfeeds me. It's the stuff that can make me fall asleep to who I really am.
The most enlivening counter I've found to this are regular wake-up practices.
Walking, driving, making dinner without music, podcasts, phone calls. Meditation or contemplation, even if only for two minutes. Writing down any insights that arise in silence, no matter how minor they seem.
It can be scary. The undistracted mind appears to be a terrifying wilderness to go into. But silence and stillness don't bring us into our mind. They return us to what Dostoyevsky called the larger intelligence, which encompasses our heart, soul, and, perhaps lastly, head.
And in this greater sense of being, we begin to get reminders of who we are.
There will always be stuff that gets in the way of becoming who we want to be. Part of the process of becoming is how we handle that stuff. And the more we can wake ourselves up, in moments tiny or tremendous, the more we come into the truth of ourselves.